I know we’re “technically” about wizard ROCK here at the ‘pedia, but (thankfully!) there’s so many genres that fit under that larger umbrella. Today I want to talk to you about some straight-up wizard RAP. Gritty, intense, green-and-silver wizard rap. The Slytherin House Mixtape, a collaboration between Adam WarRock and Mikal kHill, was released in late February of this year, and if you haven’t listened to it yet, go download it for free, listen, and become obsessed.

As far as I know, this is their first foray into the wizarding arena. Mikal kHill is a member of Thought Criminals, a NC-based nerdcore hip-hop duo, with emcee Sulfur. (Check our their material here!) Adam WarRock makes music in abundance. From Gravity Falls to Arrested Development to Game of Thrones to Disney’s animated short Paperman, WarRock has covered a significant chunk of pop culture through his music.

The Slytherin House Mixtape (which is a FREE download, by the way) gives me a similar feel as the Browncoats Mixtape, which should come as no surprise since WarRock and kHill are frequent collaborators. They both felt that they’d set the bar pretty high with their Browncoats mixtape, and they decided their next project should tackle an even bigger franchise. Both WarRock and kHill are huge fans of the Harry Potter series, and both identify as Slytherins, so that was a natural progression into this project. The original idea, WarRock says, “was to make it a subtle retelling of the story from Draco’s perspective,” but they both realized there was so much more that they had to say, so the mixtape transformed into being about Slytherins in general.

Bear with me for a minute, readers. I feel the need to begin this review by saying that I spent about 3 hours cyberscreaming about this mixtape on Twitter. I’ve been a fan of Adam WarRock since I discovered his Downton Abbey song and the Browncoats Mixtape. I cannot say enough good things about his music. He raps about literally everything that I love. I’m going to try to give coherent opinions on each track, but if it devolves into gushy nonsense, I apologize in advance.

The mixtape opens with an introduction, which samples audio directly from the Goblet of Fire movie; specifically, Voldemort’s rebirth and the Death Eater gathering in the graveyard. Helluva way to start an album.

Next comes “Parseltongue,” which is about exactly what you think it is. “Parseltongue” is the first track that WarRock and kHill wrote for the album, and WarRock says that “it is kind of a perfect representation of that sensibility we wanted on the album.” “Parseltongue” definitely sets the tone for the rest of the album: forceful, in-your-face wizard rap. My favorite thing about this track is the extended hissing sounds throughout. Especially the hook: “Teach ya how to speak in Parseltonge, like thissssssss, like thissssssss.”

Next up is “Wands Out,” about Slytherins having each other’s backs when times get tough. It opens with Hedwig’s Theme, which kHill sampled from John Williams’ score. This transitions into a drum beat that is punctuated with pitches from Hedwig’s Theme. The verses on this track are full of various spells from the series, and their respective actions. One of my favorite verses on the entire mixtape is on this track. It’s kHill’s verse that begins with “Evanesco, I said step off, yo.”

“House of Black” is about the most noble and ancient house of wizards. WarRock’s opening vocals alternate between slow and fast tempos, according to the beats in the background. As the music speeds up, so does WarRock. kHill takes over for the chorus, and continues into the second verse, which touches on Sirius’ time in Azkaban and his continuing anger towards Peter Pettigrew. “Here we go, through the veil, and it’s time for me to leave. Finally I can see my friends again when I close my eyes and sleep.”

Slytherins are some of the most shrewd and cunning students at Hogwarts, and that trait is wholly exemplified in “Ambition.” This song is basically an anthem for WarRock and kHill, which you can tell from their verses. kHill opens the song, “Takin’ exactly what I’m owed, workin’ hard for everything I own” in the first verse, and WarRock follows in the second verse with: “Don’t talk to me about academic ethics and nonsense, I’m magic when on the mic and people askin’ how the song went. It went amazing like it does whenever I’m rappin’, and I’m toasting Butterbeers with kHill and Ceschi after the fact.” It’s very clear that WarRock and kHill work exceptionally hard on all their endeavours, so “Ambition” is basically their mission statement. “Ambition” also features rapper Ceschi Ramos, who is the co-founder of Fake Four Inc., an independent record label. kHill says that since he and WarRock are usually categorized as nerdy musicians, “it was a lot of fun to pull someone more known for folk-rap singer-songwriter stuff in to the mix and he did an amazing job with it.”

“Malfoys” comes next on the album, all about everyone’s favorite fabulous, fair-haired Death Eater family. This track features tons of awesome rhymes about the Malfoy family’s current and past members. “Son of Abraxus, father of Draco, wife is Narcissa, cursed if I say so.” “In the fight, we keep our necks safe. That’s how our family’s been heads of state since 1698.” “I’m the next, the best, in a long, long line, the son of a Death Eater with a smug, smug smile.” I could go on, but it would literally just be me transcribing all the lyrics. So, do both of us a favor and go listen to it.

Next up is “Unforgivable (Bellatrix’s Theme).” This song really exemplefies Bellatrix’s blind devotion to Voldemort, and how much she truly cared about him. It also touches on how Bellatrix was seemingly incapable of feeling real affection towards others. WarRock says in the chorus, “Love to her’s an unforgivable curse, cause it’s strange the way it hurts.”

The next track is “Dark Mark,” the Death Eaters anthem. The song opens with the chorus: “And the art that we carve on our arms is the Dark Mark, don’t even start with how dark it is in our hearts.” This song captures the Death Eaters’ mindset about their place in the wizarding society: pureblooded, “nature’s nobility.” It also touches on their complete devotion to their cause: “So if you join us, strap your arm to the table, if you’re willing and able, to lay down your life to stop that boy in the fable.” “Dark Mark” also features a verse from Dr. Awkward, continuing the theme of unlimited power and devotion: “Aurors will fight, and the Ministry will fall, and the only of us left will be those who answered the call. With loyalty and malice, we are servants of the Dark Arts, our badge of honor, wear it proudly, is the Dark Mark.”

The next track, “The Hallows,” is a retelling of the Three Brothers fairytale. WarRock opens the song with a verse about Cadmus Peverell, special guest Tribe One takes verse two about Ignotus Peverell, and kHill takes the third verse about Antioch Peverell. The chorus contains one of my favorite lines on the whole album: “Hold them at once and you’ll always see tomorrow.”

WarRock and kHill take on the Half-Blood Prince’s history with “Always.” kHill raps this entire song on his own. When we were first discussing this album, Russ said that his review would just be all the lyrics to this song and a .gif of a mic drop. That’s basically my sentiment as well, so I’m not going to say much more on this song. Just go listen. It’s one of the best songs about Snape that I’ve heard.

The album ends with “The Boy Who Lived.” It opens with soaring strings and transitions into a pulsing, forward-moving beat. This is the only song that is not about Slytherins specifically. It could feel out of place, given the tone of the rest of the album, but it’s mentioned multiple times that Harry would have done well in Slytherin, so it fits. This song focuses on the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts, and how Harry has become a man with a future, while still a boy with a storied past. “When I die let my name ring over the hills, let them speak about the Boy Who Lived, still.”

Both WarRock and kHill are regularly categorized as nerdcore/geek musicians, to which WarRock says, “We just make music how we know how to make it, and the categorization comes later.” With all their combined releases, neither have put out anything Potter-related. That fact alone makes this powerhouse of an album all the more special.  If this is the only mark that WarRock and kHill leave on the wizard community, then it’s a big-ass Dark Mark.

PS: The guys also know about Harry and the Potters, and kHill even said he would love to do a show with them. So, y’know. Somebody needs to make that happen.